well behaved women

After coming across one too many frustrating fanfiction, I have to babble a little on the subject of characterization. I used to do this all the time with Max back in the day--ah, the miseries of the hellish Dark Angel fandom. (Question--why do I even go on Fanfiction.net anymore?)

Okay, so. Your entire family--everyone you know and love--is murdered by the person you most adore and look up to most. On top of that, you've grown up training for a life of warfare, subterfuge, assassination...and who wants to bet the Uchiha family didn't pound in 'duty' and 'honor' from an early age? And yet, because the second some people who also care for you come along you don't take the initiative to abandon the goal--the 'solution'--your traumatized and alone child's mind fixated on, you're evil? (I mean, looking at it, I sure as hell would go the fuck after someone who killed my family. No questions asked, no damage too great.)

Obviously I don't have a problem with people not liking him, I just wish they would stop writing him as a scenery-chewing villain instead of a selfish and fucked up individual. He's a kid. Kids don't move beyond this shit without help, and by the time he enters the manga he's pretty much been left alone too long. Some damage you don't go back from.

To be honest, I don't even like Sasuke that much. From the beginning I was both exasperated by and deeply fond of Sakura--who can't love a clever little girl with a melodramatic crush, a mean right hook and a scary voice in her head? frankly, as much as I love post timeskip Sakura, I might like her more as a character preTS--alternated between wanting to hug the heck out of Naruto and being glad Sakura was whacking him one for me, and found Kakashi and Sasuke both a bit boring.

It wasn't until the bridge that that abated a little, when it became obvious that all his stoicism was pretty much bullshitting in that deeply melodramatic way preteens have, especially ones with PTSD, and then in the forest when he made it clear that he cared for the whole team. Generally the whole 'wants to keep all they could care about far away' thing bores me at best, but he's like twelve. I could make allowances. Then the whole abandoning the village thing, and while--see above--I wasn't going to blame him for being fucked up in the head enough to believe that was the only way, I wasn't going to be fond of him either. I find him most interesting post timeskip because while his teammates have grown, despite all new pointy bits and flashy tricks, he hasn't. He's still shit with interacting with people, he still doesn't know why the heck girls like him so much, and as recent chapters indicate, he hasn't really moved on from Team 7 at all.

Although to be perfectly honest? The fanfic I ran across that skewed him the most out of character was Sakura/Sasuke. Not even goopy OOC. Psycho evil OOC. Some fic where he besieges Konoha just so he can rape Sakura--but she....finds him sexy so it's all right? AGH--while spouting mustache-twirling lines. At which point I stagger away from the screen clutching my eyes. WHY FANDOM WHY. WHY CAN I NEVER ESCAPE THE 'RAPE IS LOVE'.

Safety Protocols
Naruto
PG13
Itachi/Sakura for a kink meme, no actual porn. :( My attempt at cyberpunk, as requested.

She's spent six days working on cracking these firewalls, and it's giving her a fucking headache you wouldn't believe.

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Goddamn I got like nothing done this porn_battle.

Probably because I've been feeling like shit all week. I keep forgetting to hydrate and forgetting to eat until my stomach's cramping-empty and not getting enough sleep and my foot, which had just dialed down on the PAIN settings just got whacked again and now HURTS LIKE A FUCKING BITCH sorry please excuse my language **hides**

Also, I think Kishimoto sucks just a little bit--we get a chance to see her involved in a fight again and she gets kicked away? And Naruto catches her? REALLY, MAN? The lady who kicked the ass of an Akatsuki member?--but man, I still love Sakura madly. Most of his girls, actually. For all her human flaws, for all her dramatics and passion and temper and stubbornness--man, made of AWESOME.

I almost forgive you, Kishimoto. ALMOST. I mean, you're excluding her again, so not really, but damn.

And Naruto fandom, would you please shut up about Karin? So she likes Sasuke. She's also a sharp-edged, extremely intelligent, so far exceedingly competent and probably equally badass combat-wise kunoichi that suffered experimentation since she was young and um yes is kind of gorgeous. (I am shallow! So sorry!) She can punch a man's face off! She is not a crazy jealous bitch. (So far. And none of her attitude has really hinted at it. Crushing on Sasuke--whatever, he's attractive. Tricking Suigetsu--whatever, he would be annoying if you actually had to deal with him.) ALL characterization given so far suggests she would evaluate Sakura as an opponent, not immediately lose all brain power in order to make Sakura look better. All you really seem to be saying with that particular piece of OOC goodness is that Sakura couldn't stand up to an IC Karin. She can, so stop demeaning them both.

Also, my computer will no longer properly play my Baccano! discs. The sound you hear is the resounding noise of my heart exploding into itty bitty pieces of panic and torment.